Yesterday, in celebration of the 100th day of school, C.J. had to make his bucket list. I thought that you might enjoy it.
By the time I am 100 years old, I hope I…
Throw lots of sassy parties
Visit somebody in Australia
Make lots of pretty crafts
Make lots of funny jokes
Drink tea
* * *
Trapped in the Wrong Body: Growing Up Transgender
On Tuesday, February 26, on Katie Couric’s show Katie, “you’ll hear the deeply personal stories of three transgender children and their parents, and their journeys to understand the psychological, physical, and social process to become their authentic selves…Katie will explore how medical advances are being used earlier and more safely to change the biological process of puberty…” Click here to learn more here.
* * *
2013 Parents Magazine Blog Awards
Raising My Rainbow has been selected as a finalist in the 2013 Parents Blog Awards in the category of “Most Likely to Inspire You to Change the World.” There are only a few days left to vote. Then I’ll quite bugging you about this.
Voting is super simple. Just click here and select my blog under the “Most Likely to Inspire You to Change the World” category. You can vote once a day until Feb. 24.
Don’t want people on your feed to know that you voted? Click the “Vote” button, on the next screen click on the silhouette people near the bottom of the page, choose the “custom” option and click on “Only Me,” save the change and hit “Share.” Or, share it to your wall, then go to your wall and delete the post by clicking on the “x” next to the post. I won’t be offended. Swearsies.
I’m from Australia (ex-pat at the moment!) and I would absolutely love to meet this beautiful kid. Tell CJ he’s welcome anytime. We can do Disney duets together (Belle’s my favourite princess, but Tarzan has the best music).
Visit somebody in Australia – If he visits during Mardi Gras of Fashion Week he would have a ball, so many sequins!
CJ could probably do all of those at once actually and just check them off his lists in bulk haha.
Hello 🙂 I just nominated your for the Very Inspiring Blogger Award. Please click on the link to find out more: http://calliegarp.wordpress.com/2013/02/25/very-inspiring-blog-award-and-lessons-in-putting-it-out-there/
Thank you so much for sharing your experiences in raising your child. I think it’s only through solidarity that we can change the way we thing about gender and sex identity and expression. Reading through some of the comments above, I am reminded that it’s not about having the politically correct label or saying the right thing all the time. It’s about sharing our mistakes, misunderstandings, big steps and celebrations and figuring it all out. I’m so glad I can share in on the journey you’re making.
Voted and shared! 🙂
I bet Quentin Crisp made a very similar list when he was CJ’s ageQ!
Dagnabit! I’m not at all like CJ, his mom, dad, or cj’s brother, but all’a you guys got me wanting t’go to Australia for a sassy party and crafts!
Long time reader, first time commenter… but I had to come and let you know that I was reading an article today on an Australian news website, and they mentioned you! (http://www.news.com.au/lifestyle/parenting/how-to-talk-to-your-children-about-gay-parents/story-fnet08ui-1226582484610)
PS. If CJ is coming down under and throwing a sassy party, please put me on the invite list!
Hi there, our kids are a bit younger than CJ (elder girl 3yrs, younger is 2yrs) but you’re welcome to come visit us in Adelaide, Australia anytime.
We could take you to Monarto Zoo to see the giraffes and lions and cheetahs and meerkats… (www.zoossa.com.au/monarto-zoo)
What a lovely post with such beautiful comments from some amazing people. You and CJ have quite the fan group!
I’ve voted for your blog, and asked for my facebook and tumblr friends to do the same. By far one of my favorite blogs. You just keep on doin’ what you’re doin. And CJ should keep staying the same awesome and sassy princess we’ve all come to love through your writing.
Wow! I am so impressed with Australia right now! I love CJ and his family and I admire SO MUCH that they are making themselves visible in order to help other people in similar situations. And even those who just need to open their minds and hearts. THANK YOU CJ and family for giving of yourselves for the love of others! 🙂
CJ and I have remarkably similar bucket lists!
I don’t really understand all this transgender v. transsexual stuff. I don’t understand whether this boy is gay or is completely straight but, for whatever reason, enjoys “girlie” things.
I do understand that he’s just a little boy, and he deserves to be whoever he is and to be happy. I follow this blog simply because I like the stories. CJ sounds like a funny kid and his family’s adventure is both entertaining and interesting to me. CJ is a boy I wish my own sons were friends with, as they would embrace him for who he is.
Thanks for sharing your stories with the world. You are obviously reaching people who struggle with the same issues as your family, and that’s amazing. You also reach folks like me. I’m just an average man with an average family, but I’m learning a lot from blogs like yours about people who have things they must deal with as a family. While our issues are different, the fact that we have issues to overcome as a family is the same. We can all learn something from each other.
I wish your family well!
I have voted for your blog x
Tell CJ that he’s got my vote and he always will!
I’m starting to think that it might be selfish of me to want CJ to come and visit me in Tasmania… maybe all of us in Australia and New Zealand should meet up and have one big sassy, crafty, joke-filled tea-drinking party – with CJ as guest of honour, of course!
I love this post from Jane….. 🙂
This!
I would love to meet such a wonderful group of people that is CJ & his family.
Ooh, plenty of peeps Down Under who’d welcome your little rainbow!
I have tea, jokes, sassy parties, and pretty crafts. Come visit me, I’m in Australia! 😀
Well he is more than welcome to come and visit me in Australia! X
He had me at “sassy parties”.
Pardon me but—“Trapped in the wrong body, growing up transgender” I acknowledge people to be transgendered if they’re formed as males or females, who believe they’d rather be the other sex in terms of gender anatomy. If by transgender is meant males affecting stereotyped female accoutrements or pursuits like sewing, I will not agree those are innate to females. I wouldn’t agree a boy is transgendered who wants to wear frilly petticoats 24/7, if that’s all he wanted, if there were a chainsaw to my throat and a bazooka to my temple. If a guy says he wants sex reassignment surgery, then I’ll agree there’s transgenderism going on. Most all of the 41,349 gender signals assigned exclusively to females—glitter, ruffles, lace, glitzy shoes—I discount as being female intrinsic. Males historically went through several centuries of renunciation of things today that would be thought effeminate—pleated neck ruffs, lace, ribbons, gowns, decorative shoes. It was so foolish that men gave up decoration. Today, we face a severe challenge to recover recognition of rights to expression. As fashion designer Elizabeth Hawes said in “It’s Still Spinach” (1954)—“That our men are not allowed to satisfy their souls in such simple human ways is a terrible thing.” Friends, I have a fab collection of pleated skirts and petticoats which I wear presenting as a guy—with facial hair. And am still quite keen on how much steel I can toss over my head in the garage. Transgendered? Not at all. I’m however, not inhibited as to being male.
Thank you, enjoyed your comment more than the post (: And I can relate, being a “boyish girl” (:
Charles, what you’re seeing there is that your working definition of “transgender” is closer to the definition more commonly given to the term “transsexual.” “Transgender” is more often used as a broader umbrella for those whose gender identity in some way transcends or transgresses cultural gender norms, which are socially constructed and change over time but are deeply imbedded in culture and personal identity. Gender is a deeply encoded aspect of personality, one formed by complex genetic and epigenetic develpomental processes, but is not the same as physical sex in all people. CD is often considered to be under the transgender umbrella, which means there’s a world of support out there if you need it.
This is why “gender non-conforming” or “gender-creative” are such great terms. It prevents putting people in a box that might not fit them. These terms are tremendously empowering for the child and the family. They show in a positive light that the child is not conforming to society’s opinion of what he should be. And “creative” shows that he is not limited to society’s opinions, that he is able to move beyond those limits to be creative with his own life and to be true to himself!
I’m highly aware of how members of the Fascistic mental health cult define terms. My
mission is to clarify the intentional deceit they work on the gullible. They equate majority attire habits with normal liver functioning! Psychiatry is not medicine. In psychiatry, when a few people are doing something, it’s “illness;” if the majority starts doing it, it is now “health.” In REAL medicine, radiation poisoning would be an illness regardless of if a minority or a majority had it! Look up “A Curious Disease” editorial in the New York Times on women in pants! “CD” also desperately needs correction; it’s being used BOTH to describe a man in a skirt, even if he’s presenting as a man, AND also men attempting to present as women! No man is cross dressed unless he has on a BRA! If a man is attempting to pass, it’s fair to call him a female impersonator. If a man is wearing a skirt, you may without prejudice call him a man in a skirt, or a nonconformist. Calling him a CD you are validating psychiatry, an INVALID pseudoscience! How dare you suggest I need “support;” I am NOT crossdressing any more than women in blue jeans and T shirts. You can’t rationally equate majority attire habits with biological determinism! I suggest reading the embedded pdf at the site linked to see how society INSISTED on defining any trouser style as male exclusive, and how women in pants were called “PATIENTS!” As late as the 1960’s and 70’s, women in pants were denied entrance into restaurants or if admitted, segregated into separate areas because men (and women in dresses) objected to them. Mental health cultists treat men who want freedom of style the same way the KKK calls Blacks “niggers!” And all that prejudice egged on by psychiatrists and psychologists (see for ex 1958 Horace English). Psychiatry has nothing to add to gender discussion which is worth hearing. It’s all repression. Can’t you see that people want choices in clothes as a consequence of being human? You’re
obstinately hanging on to the discredited concept, revoked as it would operate against women, that people want to wear a set of clothes due to which gender they are! Women wear all syles because they’re raised to! Men wear one basic style because they’re
raised to! “CD,” forget it, that’s obsolete, and was wrong when the notion was codified.
Thank you Charles! So nicely said!
I’m sorry, but I’m fascinated with this man’s steel, and where his garage is located. I think I just added him to my bucket list.
CJ’s bucket list rocks! He’s gonna do all that stuff! 🙂
This is so timely since I’m reading this while on a trip to Brisbane (I live in San Diego) drinking tea!
My husband says CJ should come to Australia and visit Matthew Mitcham, the openly-gay Olympic swimmer. We think Matthew probably enjoys sassy parties and funny jokes.
Matthew Mitcham is a diver 🙂
I live in Australia and my 19 year old daughter says she wants to be his best friend as he is just like her 🙂
Tell him I live in Australia and he would love my peacocks!