On Giuliana Rancic: I’d wear that to a fancy Easter dinner.
On Mindy Kaling: It looks like she was a blueberry and then she got run over right up her middle and the blueberries squeezed out her armpits.
On Sam Smith and Jimmy Napes: Are they married? They should be.
On Alicia Vikander: Hello lemons! Now THAT looks like the Oscars!
On Sofia Vergara: It looks like a curtain that a grandma would have and a little too much of her boobs are out. But I love her earrings.
On Priyanka Chopra: That is way too much see through. Her belt looks like a lock for a diary.
On Olivia Wilde: She’s not a dog so she doesn’t need a collar. And she’s not Miley Cyrus so she doesn’t need that top. The bottom looks like a cupcake wrapper.
On Saoirse Ronan: I don’t see anything wrong with it, except the earrings.
On Naomi Watts: That’s my favorite so far! She looks like a mermaid. Favorite.
On Olivia Munn: I like it. It looks like she is wearing a side cape. Are Forevermark diamonds from Forever 21?
On Jennifer Jason Lee: It looks like an old timey hat. Is she drunk or something?
On Rooney Mara: Too much lace. She has lots of hair; she should have a big bun, not a tiny bun.
On Brie Larson: I LOVE IT! I don’t even have any words! I LOVE IT!
On Heidi Klum: She can do better than that. It’s like Cinderella got in a fight with her stepsisters and they ripped off her sleeve and her boob line.
On Bryan Cranston: Snooze.
On Chrissy Teigen: Too bad someone squirted hot sauce all over her.
On Ashley Graham: She did her boobs all wrong. She needs to fix it a lot. She did it all wrong. All wrong.
On Cate Blanchett: That looks nice with her skin color. How does she get her skin to look like that?
On Jared Leto: He’s the funnest boy!