Our Month in Review: September 2017

Following are highlights from our month on Instagram. Click here for all of the months’ pictures, thoughts and happenings. If you’re on Instagram, follow me. If you already follow me, thanks!

 I love my brother and am so thankful for him. He watched the boys all weekend so Matt and I could sneak away to Seattle with friends. He helped Chase host a pool party, took him shopping for school supplies, got him a haircut and took him to his first high school dance. He introduced CJ to *Birdcage* and *The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert* and bought him his first curling iron. He had a pork roast and mashed potatoes waiting for us when we got home. I learned how to parent an LGBTQ child by watching my parents raise Michael and doing the opposite of what they did. Matt and I aren’t alone in raising our boys; Uncle Michael is with us every step of the way. He loves the boys, he worries about them, celebrates them and spoils them. The boys see him as equal parts fun parent and loyal best friend. If you don’t have an Uncle Michael in your life, you should get one.


“David was threatening because it was a different consciousness. Whatever you want to call it — the feminization of the male or whatever it was — us boy/girls were a threat.” — Mick Rock, David Bowie’s official photographer. Matt and I visited the Museum of Pop Culture while in Seattle this weekend. The “Bowie by Mick Rock” exhibit was my favorite. I read this quote over and over. Back then, boy/girls were a threat. Today boy/girls are a threat. When will boy/girls stop being a threat?

First writing prompt of the 5th grade: How would you spend one million dollars? “I would love to spend one million $. First, I would travel. I would travel to Hawaii and New York City. Next, I would spend some money on clothes, such as designer bags and designer hats. Finally, I would go shopping. I would buy a curling iron and a lot of makeup. I would love to spend a million $.” (By CJ, age 10) Please note: The paragraph was written before Uncle Michael bought him his first curling iron. So, CJ’s dreams are already coming true.


“A bunch of people ask me how I can possibly be so awesome. I tell them, ‘in the words of Lady Gaga, I was born this way’.” — CJ, age 10. For the record, I’ve never heard anyone, let alone “a bunch” of people, ask him how he can possibly be so awesome. But I’m glad he has a standard answer, I guess.


CJ scored these roller skates last time we went antiquing. Like every 10-year-old boy, antiquing is one of his favorite weekend activities. He felt that $12 was a steal for these skates because – according to the label – they are “official roller derby skates.” $12 is a good price for anything that’s “official,” he told me. When I was CJ’s age, one of my favorite weekend activities was getting my brother and his boom box out to the front yard so we could choreograph roller skating routines like we were in Xanadu. #likeunclelikenephew


“Mom, I’m going to do this to you and two of your girlfriends. You just all sit close together and I’m gonna braid your hair together in one big braid. It will be fun and awesome.” — CJ, age 10

“Don’t worry, mom. I already warned my teacher that if I’m tired today it’s because I was at a music video premiere at the YouTube Space in LA last night,” CJ.


CJ is the biggest fan of his own fashion designs. To make your own pair of “gay shorts inspired by the boys who were at pride,” cut off a pair of jeans, hem them, add some embroidery detail and attach suspenders. Voila! Then, try to wear them every day and have an attitude when your mom says you can’t.

Be courageous.



About raisingmyrainbow

RaisingMyRainbow.com is a blog about the adventures in raising a fabulous, gender creative son.
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7 Responses to Our Month in Review: September 2017

  1. Z says:

    I like wearing suspenders like CJ does. The first time I saw them worn like that was on Tommy from Digimon, which in all honesty isn’t as terrible a place to get fashion tips as it sounds sometimes.

  2. bestpi says:

    Loved it. So much just plain living! And that is fantastic. I can’t wait for the day when none of the differences will matter. I probably won’t live long enough to see it, but knowing it is on the way makes my heart very happy. Thanks for sharing so much of your lives with us. I’m sure it gives so many hope.

  3. Tiffany says:

    I have been following your blog for awhile now as a avenue to read about similarities between your son and mine. Where do you start when your son says he wants to be a girl?
    He is 11 and has been wearing long T shirts as dresses since he was 3. Drawing mermaids and fairies since he could pick up a pencil. He is is happiest when he is wearing a girls dress (at a friends house). He knows what transgender means and actually asked yesterday if he was transgender and liked a boy would that make him gay? We as parents are as supportive as we can be but I don’t know if I’m armed with the right information on what to do now. Do we see a counselor to help him understand his feelings and what he is going through? Where did you start with CJ?

  4. I’m relatively new to your blog/space; my 3.5 year old son is gender creative, my husband and I are coming to grips with that might mean and how we can best love/support him as we move forward. He is a joy and delight and we yearn to do right by him, from the start (even though, as like any parents, we are so far from perfect). Your blog and your book has literally SAVED us, Matt’s article in The Atlantic was a turning point for my husband in his journey towards acceptance. I just want to say, from a few flock of families/parents that we appreciate you SO MUCH, all you’ve written and the support and life-sharing you all still put out there. I bought 10 copies of your book to give to all of our friends and family – some understand, some don’t … Anyway, thank you, from the bottom of my heart. CJ and Chase, you are both wonderful brothers and young people (…I also have an older gender normative son, and a younger gender creative son). ❤ Christina

  5. Kevin J Bogart says:

    You and your family are on my short list of heroes.

  6. AlphaMom says:

    Those dimples!

  7. I never had a daughter to raise, but if I had, I hope/think I would have raised her like I raised my son: to be loving, to accept everyone, to be himself, whoever that might be.

    You are doing a fantastic job of raising your whole family, which includes Matt and yourself. Because parents raise themselves as they raise their children. We grow together.

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